Funky Forest: The First Contact

Funky Forest: The First Contact


Directed by Katsuhito Ishii, Hajime Ishimine, Shunichiro Miki

Starring Andrew Alfieri, Hideaki Anno, Moyoco Anno, Tadanobu Asano, Maya Banno

Rating: ******

Two hosts try to make us believe this is kid friendly.

Funky Forest…
Sure. Why not?
I’ll review this movie
That has no plot.

It’s a Japanese film
That’s overlong.
It’s aimed at children,
But comes out feeling wrong.

It’s a movie not easy
To recommend.
What person will watch this
To the end?

Don’t ask. You really don’t want to know the answer.

It’s filled with sketches
That continue,
Becoming storylines
That push on through,

Whether or not
They connect with the theme
About aliens
And their visiting.

Small, shriveled aliens
With human faces
Connect to one’s navel,
Of all places

One of the Guitar Brothers.

Who play guitar
While all on par.

A man in a suit
With a big long…thing
Asks a female student
To pull on his…string.

Since randomness
And plot don’t flow,
The story is nowhere
Sensible to go.

We’re subjected to two dancing kids in tight leather.

Two and a half hours
Is hardly a breeze.
It was too much for even
The Japanese

A money loser
Everywhere it was shown,
One must wonder how it ended up
Here at home

But it’s bizarre and strange,
And so bad it’s good.
You’ll never forget it,
Though you might wish you could

Yes, that’s a butthole TV.

As a movie,
I give it two out of six,
But it gets one more star
For the experience.

If you’re curious,
Don’t watch it alone.
Invite another sufferer
To join you in your home.

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